fuseblog

Pete Wentz Has A Bachelor Party

Ah, the male rituals of marriage. The courtship, the proposal, the eyeliner, the bachelor party... it's all been a part of the Pete Wentz and Ashlee Simpson's Road To Marriage, which hit a milestone this week when bassist/groom-to-be Pete Wentz had his awesome bachelor party! Wentz, his FOB BMs (Fall Out Boy Band Mates), future manager-in-law Joe Simpson, Joel Madden (Of Madden Football) and some non-famous people kicked things off with dinner at Mr. Chow, a Bev Hills eatery. They then moved on to the Roosevelt Hotel, where they partied in a suite. Just a bunch of guys in a suite celebrating a bachelor party. FOB fans, close your eyes and imagine that scene.

Also kickin' it...

Those spring chickens Metallica kicked it 80s style and played a club show in order to prove they can keep it real. This being Metallica, though, a "club" means the 2300 capacity Wiltern Theatre in LA, which could probably fit several clubs inside. They played classics like For Whom The Bell Tolls, Master Of Puppets and NO new material. Which is awesome.

Taylor Hicks, who was an American Idol at some point, is coming to Broadway! Which is as good a reason as any to not come to Broadway.

And those cool winners the RIAA may have to pay a #$%! load of legal fees. Karma: still existing in 2008!

In summation:

Pete Wentz Celebrates With Bachelor Party in LA [People]

Metallica Play Club Show, Eye Fall Tour [Reuters]

Taylor Hicks To Play Teen Angel In Broadway's Grease [AP]

Judge Recommending Legal Fees In RIAA v. Andersen [Wired]

Britney In Rear-Ender

Pic above of Sally Worth mentioning Vampire Weekend

It's been awhile since we mentioned our old friend Britney Spears around these parts. This Brit hiatus was and is a result of boredom, lack of truly weird news and plain old fatigue - hasn't the world had enough Britney? Allow us to answer our own semi-rhetorical question: who knows. But once in awhile, something so juicy, so bizarre, so straight up wack occurs that we must acknowledge said happening. That happening? Oh, nothing. She rear-ended a car the other day, that's all. But why is this news? It isn't. But it's in character, kinda pathetic, and it allows a million magazine editors and bloggers to run a headline similar to what you see above. Welcome back, Britney! (Get it, Back? never mind...)

Also Rustling In the Cultural Breeze...

Jessica Simpson and Tony Romo have hit the showers, in an end-of-the-relationship, not a steamy, way. This according to Alan Peppard, who appears to be a gossip columnist for The Dallas Morning News. What will Dallas-Fort Worth area gossip-hounds write about now? Do we care?

Just when you thought Vampire Weekend were everywhere, they are even more everywhere. Pitchfork reports that the Afropop appropriators were mentioned in Sally Worth. Yes, the comic strip Sally Worth.

Jay-Z has responded to Oasis guitarist Noel Gallagher's claim that hip-hop doesn't belong at Glastonbury, the long-running UK summer festival. The world has to change, according to Jay. It's a beautiful thing, he says. Rappers have paid their dues, Jay notes. Yawn. Before I was exited for Jay-Z's Glasto set. Now? Not so much.

Once Again...

Britney's Latest Smash Hit! [E! Online]

Sources Confirm Jessica Simpson / Tony Romo Break-up [Dallas Morning News]

Indie Rock Hits The Funny Pages, Again [Pitchfork]

I Got 99 Problems But the Pitch Ain't One [The Sun, via Stereogum]

R.E.M. To W - Yes, I Would Like Fries With That

Did you know that if you show up even a few minutes after McDonald's cut-off time for serving breakfast, and you want breakfast, you're screwed? It's true. Try it. No McGriddle For You. But we digress, before we even started. Here goes:

Peter Buck, the beloved, gentlemanly guitarist for R.E.M. has told President Bush to get a job - at McDonald's (oh snap)! According to Spinner, Buck recently mused to Uncut Magazine that there was probably a McDonald's somewhere that could use a manager and, according to Buck, "he seems like the kind of purse-mouthed snot nose who'd be great at terrifying 13-year-olds." And everyone else.

Also Wasting Our Time...

The Led Zeppelin touring rumors are kicking into gear again... According to the UK's The Mirror, Zep will tour at the end of this year or in early 2009. The source of this rumor mongering? None other than David Coverdale, the Whitesnake vocalist and Plant wannabe who was, of course, one half of Coverdale/Page (a 1993 very, very, very poor man's Page and Plant) and whom Plant famously has called David Coverversion. Coverdale seems to think Whitesnake will open this tour. Don't count on it.

Oasis are set to introduce their fourth drummer, if some blog is to be taken at its word. According to What Became Of The Likely Broads, current Oasis drummer (and son of Ringo Starr) Zak Starkey ain't getting along too well with Noel Gallagher these days. But that never stopped Liam from leaving.

And finally, Metallica launched an awesome new site called Mission: Metallica, in which we the devoted Metallica fans, get to eavesdrop on the recording of their newest album. Unfortunately, soon after launch, the site crashed. Unless Metallica is recording a hot new track called "403 Forbidden," that thing's downer than St. Anger sales figures.

Once again:

R.E.M. Guitarist Says President Bush Should Work At McDonald's [Spinner]

Led Zeppelin Set For World Tour [The Mirror]

Oasis Has A Lineup Change? [What's Become Of The Likely Broads]

Metallica's Mission Beta Site Goes Live (And Then It Goes Dead) [Blabbermouth.com]

A Cute Pop Star Has Acute Laryngitis

In case you were unaware, Avril Lavigne's been all over this great continent of ours, bringing her "Best Damn Tour" to a corporately-named arena near you for awhile now. She was nearing the end but she just... couldn't... make it. Why? Homegirl's voxbox plain pooped out, Herb. In a message on her official site, Avril was un-Complicatedly contrite:

"My sincerest apologies to all of my fans. My intention was to complete the rest of the tour but tonight at sound check in Anaheim I realized this wasn't possible."

Pretty boring. Avril's kind of disappeared from the zeitgeist, has she not? Remember her clothing line?

Also Up In Our Grill:

The New York Post wonders if network television is the new rehab after Lindsay Lohan announces she will follow in Britney Spears' guest star footsteps and begin a six-episode stint on Ugly Betty. If one were to observe the actions of these stars, one would think that diminishing entertainment returns and dwindling respect levels are the "new rehab." And one would be right.

In other repellent Lohan news, People Mag and others are reporting that Lindsay "borrowed" an $11,000 mink fur coat she found after some fab party at some fab Manhattan joint (1Oak). According to the owner, she was unable to find her coat at the end of her partying on January 26th and assumed the coat was gone forever. That is, until she spotted Lohan wearing the coat in some celeb rag. After threatening to sue, she received a discreet phone call from some discreet people discreetly informing her that her coat was ready for pickup. BTW, the owner of the coat is a 22 year-old student at Columbia. She must have sold a lot of heavy books back last semester.

Finally, Scarlett Johansson is engaged to Van Wilder and has taken to showing off a rock as proof. The AP has a photo of her diamond-encrusted left hand. Stereogum has some video of her Tom Waits thing.

The Police Like Trees

Those hip old farts in The Police have been doing the reunion tour thang for about a year now, so they must be getting tired. Of playing, of each other, and of living in a van and loading their gear in each night to dive bars and smelly clubs. So to call attention to the end of this reunion tour, Sting, Andy Summers and Stewart Copeland gathered in Times Square today to announce that their final show ever would be... somewhere in New York. Where? Who knows. They didn't say! Which makes for a pretty un-dramatic press conference. So...

Why New York? And what's the deal with the trees? Well, they have decided to donate $1 million smackers to NYCs plan to plant a million trees by 2017. And, again, why New York? Well, The Police kicked off their first ever US tour thirty years ago with a gig at New York's late CBGBs. Now CBGBs is a John Varvatos store. So, um, they should go buy something. Right?